FEMINIPOEISM
FEMINIPOIESM
I’m recently branching into a new mini genre of Poetry and Feminism that I would like to term ‘’FEMINIPOEISM”. Feminism and Poetry are naturally connected as poetry is considered as a form of resistance and a medium to give a voice to the voiceless, therefore my poetry will be used in challenging norms and stereotypes around politics and Feminism.
My foray into Feminism was born from the wide gap of gender inequalities in my society towards women and I hope to someday arrive at my personal Utopia through writing.
As a victim of Female Genital Mutilation myself, I am passionate about advocating for women’s rights and any issues surrounding the Girlchild, poetry has been my main advocacy medium of shedding light on certain long standing traditions that ought never to see the light of another century.
I read recently, one of Bisi Adeleye Fayemi’s book ‘LOUD WHISPERS’ : https://www.amazon.com/Loud-Whispers-Bisi-Adeleye-Fayemi-ebook/dp/B079H1PPKR (part of a trilogy, above whispers) she talked about attending to misconceptions about the concept of feminism and demistyfied myths surrounding it . in the book, she highlighted a number of myths that are supposedly bandied about feminists.
1) That Feminists hate men: on the contrary, Feminists detest systems that ensure patriarchal powers are sustained in political, economic, religious, social and cultural structures in the society. Whoever run these systems perceive feminists as haters, women inclusive. Interestingly there are men who identify with feminism being a struggle against all forms of patriarchal oppression. Do such men hate men as well then?
2) That Feminists do not marry or cannot stay married: that is untrue, Feminist however do not believe a woman has to forfeit all her rights and choices once married off and tend to express their choices especially in the face of physical or emotional Abuse. Choices in this instant includes Divorce, staying married, Remarrying, or remaining single, whichever leg fits the shoe.
3) That Feminism is alien to Africa: hello? Funmilayo Ransome Kuti? Aba women riot of 1929, Margaret Ekpo, amongst the thousands of unknown women who has to put their foot down when they were asked to perform ridiculous traditional practices such as female genital mutilation (FGM), willing of widows to relatives among others in the name of culture. They weren’t called feminists, but they surely stood for an end to the marginalization of women.
4) That feminists are anti-religion: Feminists are not anti-religion, albeit they stand against against distorting the word of God that place women as second class citizens in major religious of the world.
5) Feminists are elite, educated women fighting for themselves: from references above, this is apparently a false statement, in local parlance “nor be today village women don dey fight for their rights”. The feminist movement has done a lot to make sure women all over the world can benefit from government and have equal access to fundamental human rights.
6) That feminists want to control the world like men do : no, feminists are familiar with being marginalized and do not want a world wherein women replace men as oppressors. Some see these as the push for a matriarchy, that is definitely not what feminism stands for, but rather equality.
7) Feminists are rude and arrogant: there is an homonym I will adopt here, a term for women who has an alternative viewpoint in the society, the claim that she is overreacting, in other words: she’s OvaryActing: her ovaries are acting up hence a flare up. Men on the other hand are considered reflective when they have divergent views.
8) Feminism has nothing to do with women’s empowerment: this makes no room for logical reasoning, as you cannot empower women without a feminist analysis of why the two genders have discordant powers, control and access. In her words, it is like wanting to take a shower without getting wet.
9) Feminist are against culture and tradition: this should read as feminism is against all dehumanizing cultures and traditions that has no purpose except hurt women and girls. Harmful practices such as female genital mutilation, degrading widowhood rites, child marriage, denying women their inheritance all fall under these category.
10) Feminists are a bunch of crazy, confused women : contrary to this , feminists are usually smart innovating trail blazing role modelling entrepreneurial, political leaders, mothers , wives, grandmothers and generally anyone who associate with the struggle against all forms of patriarchal oppression. This is evidenced in the crop of feminists worldwide such as Chimamanda Ngozi adicie, Bibi Bakare Yusuf, Ama Ata Aidoo, and the recent crop of young Nigeria feminists who started an organization (Feminist Coalition) that efficiently ran the #EndSARS protests across Nigeria.
The author of the book, Mrs. Bisi Adeleye Fayemi gave Special recognition to men who are great supporters of the Feminist movement, and in their capacity as professional scholars, husbands and fathers are doing a great job of proving that men too can stand in solidarity with Feminists.
Further chapters illustrate the concept of patriarchy and feminism as real life individuals in order to simplify the terms to attendees of the 4th African Feminist forum which took place in April 2016.
The term Patriarchy was nicknamed Patrick, other names were also used to depict characters that explain terms in the book. These are all fictional characters however.
Patrick is a man with power, who has set up political, economic, religious , social cultural and technological institutions over the years. Due to his machinations, billions of women and girls get less access to education, healthcare and are more vulnerable to violence and abuse in private and public. Once in a while, Patrick recruits some women, who are aptly named Patricia to do his bidding such as handling the home front with duties like child care, teaching values, norms and socializing male and female children appropriately. This is of course regimented In that from the very beginning, the society upholds the traditions concerning these children: when Patricia births a girl, a chicken is killed, when she births a boy, a goat is killed.
Patricia is empowered to teach her sons to be strong leaders, providers adventurous, dominant and forceful while her daughter grows up learning how to be submissive. Thereby efficiently raising other Patricks and Patricias. Patricia pesters her daughter until she marries and encourages her to stay on even in the face of abuse/violence after all, good women endures and never divorce. She also circumcises her daughters so as not to be over enthusiastic for sex.
This same Patricia is the overseer of grief for widows when their husband passes away, she ensures they pass through all humiliating ordeals, meanwhile if it is the other way round when a man’s wife passes, Patricia takes a woman to comfort the widower. Not forgotten is the terrorism from Patricia to her daughters-in law because no woman is ever good enough for her son, and god forbid, a woman who hasn’t given birth to more Patricks: hell on earth.
Little Patricks grow into big Patricks and carry on the family name because little Patricias are not a worthwhile investment because at some point in their lives they move on to become some other family’s Patricia and produce Patricks elsewhere.
When Patricia eventually finds herself at the receiving end of Patrick’s power, either through abuse or violence she then realizes that she was lulled into a false sense of security. Sometimes these causes her to revolt and then she becomes a FREDERICA. A Frederica is the one who refuses to be inherited by her husband’s family, the one who has now birthed FREDERICKS: the men who believe Patrick and Patricia’s ways are old and selfish. Fredericks are the men who grew up experiencing their mothers experience Patrick’s machinations and now he convinces other men that the empowerment of women means a transformed life for all.
Nowadays its evident we live with all the above mentioned characters conveniently and we are just finding ways to adjust ourselves to nature or adjusting nature to suit us.
The chapter finished with a question from the author : Are you a Patrick, a Patricia, Frederica or A Frederick?
Rounding up with a poem, which was inspired by the book below, is a perfect depiction of FEMINIPOEITISM.
CHILDREN OF THE DARK.
I was born in the night
But not last night.
Cliché much, but true to the ears
Since I have to always repeat it to my little brother, Patrick
Patrick holds the key to me
He was crowned my Lord Father, after the original died,
And breathing approval is the only cheque he signs.
A betrothal? No gender is good enough for me.
Education? No need, its only going to end up in a kitchen.
Now I am emboldened by my mother, the darkness
Since the gods of light are my sexual opposites
I am a spawn of my own self, a rebel of circumstances.
Eloping with my lover at night, only to return in the day
to serve the one who birthed me in lies and pain:
Patrick’s princess, a patriarchal Patricia
My voice is hoarse but I will keep shouting: my body, my choice
Desires in disguise no longer appeal to me
For I have long removed the traditional cloak of aloofness
And adorned the robe of liberation,
I have shed my circumcised undergarments
To stand alone, naked, by my mother, the darkness
For with her you never will see
neither body shaming, nor blame casting
And that’s why we, the children of the dark accept
That you are who you are.
Ololade Ajayi©
January 2021
References: LOUD WHISPERS ‘Bisi Adeleye Fayemi 2017.
